212.9 #1756 (DL Qual #2014

Jun 15, 2011 9:27 PM  Disneyland Talk Land
I want everyone to share their favorite Jungle Cruise CM joke. Mine is,"There's something you don't see everyday! Except for me. Every 15 minutes."

I was seriously just about to post the same thing. Great minds think alike. I like, when looking at indy, "and here's the rarest of all the creatures in the jungle, they attach to their parents for 18 to 25 years and suck them dry" - Seacow  486.1 #404 9:30PM
Well, not exactly a joke. But the whole boat yelled at the exiting Indie people. That was fun.... Joke on them - parkfan2  40.3 #4918 9:30PM
Haa that is funny - Jennabennabofenna  32.2 #5384 9:31PM
I like when some times at the end the CM says something like if you enjoyed your trip their name is John (or whatever their real name is). And you didn't have a good time, their name is Sally (or whatever the CM at the unloading dock name is)! - chrissykins  825.5 #203 9:31PM
"this is the longest river in the world. If you don't believe me, your in da nile." - MagicFeather  79.6 #3805 9:33PM
Haha I don't really have a favorite joke but I remember one time we were going up a mountain to church camp and one of our leaders used to work on that ride and so she got on the intercom of the bus and started doing the whole thing for us so the whole thing was a joke cause its like.... who knew there were elephants when you're going up a mountain? Haha - acpowers13  148.8 #2645 9:33PM
Something along the lines of...and to your right,you see the natives. You can tell which one is the female by the size of their hips...I probably flubbed it but that line is hilarious lol - VivaHate88  154.0 #2568 9:34PM
My favorite is when they translate the singing. The best one I got was " all the single ladies" - MissErikaRae  285.5 #946 9:35PM
This makes me LOL! - PrincessSarah  170.9 #2313 9:35PM
I like when u are leaving they say "get out, oh wait, that was rude of me, please get out" and the backside of water is always a classic! - kritomiester  364.1 #586 9:37PM
Another good one that you don't hear too often is, "those hippos, making you feel like they are going to do one thing, then they do the complete opposite, what a bunch of HIPPOScrites" after they blow bubbles and don't attack. - Seacow  486.1 #404 9:38PM
Something very few people have seen.....the back side of a waterfall - SUUZinOCretiredPLAID  1035.7 #165 9:38PM
My absolute fav is when you are getting out of the boats: Please watch your step and please watch your head. However, if you miss your step or you hit your head, please watch your language. There are children everywhere! Or something like that. - oxjulietelizabethxo  2.7 #56225 9:41PM
My boyfriends professor (when he was in college) was a CM before and always cracked random jokes in class - beautifultish  2.9 #55712 9:42PM
"Oh look those lions are looking over that sleeping zebra" - mommyland  289.4 #916 9:45PM
When he points to the elephant 1 and then to elephant 2 says oh wait the most scariest of all creatures, his mother in law - MarshaMouse  4429.1 #23 9:45PM
"Now look to the left to see this beautiful Sandstone...most people take it for granite (granted)...that joke rocks!" - MouseketeerforShort  340.3 #655 9:47PM
This is Trader Sam, the head salesman around here, but business is shrinking so he'll trade you two for one of yours. No matter how you slice it you'll come out a head! - Boundin  610.5 #309 9:47PM
Ginger snaps when pointing to the alligator at beginning and I laugh everytime they say that Bengal tiger can jump over 20 ft, good thing we are only 10 ft away... - MarshaMouse  4429.1 #23 9:49PM
Mine was when the whole boat yelled "backside of water" & the CM said "no, frontside of rock! Awsome...". - Anders  4.2 #21138 9:53PM
Our guide told us not to worry, she would use her gun to scare off the hippos. She then waived the gun in the air while screaming at the top oh her lungs. LOL - DisneyRose  247.7 #1310 9:54PM
Instead of using the gun, he "shooed" away the hippos with it LOL - swingingwake  217.9 #1696 9:55PM
I've only heard it once but when we went behind the water the CM said it was O2H not H2O..or when they say its the back side of water but not to try it at home cause you will hit your head on the faucet. - kristeee22  105.3 #3406 10:00PM
"interpreting" the native dancers into the hokey pokey. I crack up every time!! - JenAnneWho  300.7 #849 10:04PM
Was just on it the skipper kept having a nervous breakdown because of the fireworks no no make it stop .hilarious - jdmouse  9.9 #10147 10:12PM
At the end of the ride: "You guys have been such a great crew that I wrote you a heartfelt poem.... Roses are red, Violets are blue, Get out!" - Nala  375.3 #563 10:13PM
"Please watch your step and your head as you exit the boat. If you miss your step and hit your head well then watch your language. There are children present." - MissSwann  288.7 #922 10:15PM
When returning to the dock "...you'll be greeted by a pair of professional elbow grabbers." - Mimmy  1442.3 #105 10:17PM
I love when they talk about the man eating piranha....'But don't worry..., you ladies are safe'ξ„… makes me giggle everytime!! - SaraLuvsMickey  30.5 #5542 10:19PM
And this next joke is for our mind readers (silence) I can't help but crack up!!! - JenAnneWho  300.7 #849 10:19PM
Who woke up today and thought, 'Jungle Cruise, thats what I'm doing today'.....me too - MJisMM  31.0 #5495 10:20PM
The backside of water never gets old - loveeeyore  175.6 #2231 10:23PM
"and here's something you don't see everyday...but I do; over, and over, and over..." I love the JC - iDreamAboutDumbo  320.0 #740 10:31PM
One time the cm made a "boat running into an iceberg" reference, to which he immediately chastised himself, saying, "tsk, too soon!" - ChipnDalefan  13.6 #8384 10:32PM
At the rhino and people up the post. "It's the Jackson Five! Guess which one's Michael..." - SpencerPhreak  114.6 #3241 10:40PM
Let me take a moment to point out my favorite plants....I like that one...and that one...and that one over there. Lol I've only heard it a few times but it makes me giggle. :) - CaliGirlNiki  32.6 #5358 11:53PM
Just heard this one yesterday for the first time.... "alright everyone, how many of you woke up this morning and said to yourself, 'Disney's Jungle Cruise, I just HAVE to do it!!'?" (we all raise our hands jokingly) CM: "I did, and this time I didn't cry. That was a big milestone for me" - PrincessLunn  14.2 #8166 11:59PM
I have a few favorites....one is " you know the zebras are the oldest animals in the JC? Of course they are, they're the only ones in black and white!" "watch out everyone! I'm gonna scare these hippos away with my gun!(fires gun up in the air) oh, I hope I got that one in the tree!" hahahahaha!!!! - belleismyfave  24.5 #6132 12:06AM
1) ok, wave good bye to all those beautiful people on the docks...and now the ugly ones. 2) if you look to your right you'll see the temple of the never ending line 3) make sure you keep those body parts inside the boat while we approach the dock, I don't want you to scratch it. 4) get out. Oh that wasn't very Disney of me. Please get out. - MontanaMouse_CM  311.8 #775 12:07AM
Still love, waive goodbye to those people as you will never see them again or something to that effect. - PopcornYeti  378.6 #555 12:08AM
I agree with @chrissykins, one time at the end the CM said something like, " if you enjoyed your trip, my name is Allison. But if you didn't have a good time, my name is Megan." My family liked that because my sister's name is Megan and I'm Allyson. - AllysonWonderland  47.7 #4604 12:29AM
"that's a cambodian shrine. How do we know? It was made by real cambodian shriners" - kemal007  273.5 #1062 1:00AM
Does anyone want to see some Danger today! There it is over ther D-A-N-G-E-R right over there. (points at box that says danger) I know it's amazing your skipper can read all the signs of danger here in the jungle go ahead and take some pictures if you want. - Clu2.0  787.7 #213 3:08AM
Last trip we get to the hippo part and the cm says I'm going to try and scare them away figured then he'd do the gun thing like usual. Instead he yells at the hippos "GO AWAY!!!" Thought it was hilarious - chrisskelington  3.9 #23371 8:11AM

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We have always noticed that Saturdays are better than Sundays! We always come on the weekend and say we want to leave at dinner time on Sunday, but always leave by 11-12 because there are so many people. We love Saturday!! - 1Princess3Princes  446.2 #456 5:39PM
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I'm gonna have a crowding meetup Presidents' Day weekend! Post to come!  - TinkerSchelle  1683.2 #91 5:42PM
I'll crowd with you  - LaPearleNoir  1590.1 #97 2:27PM
I ❀️ crowding meetups - bonedaddy909  1327.3 #114 12:29PM
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What day works best for you guys bonedaddy909 and susanann and LaPearleNoir? - TinkerSchelle  1683.2 #91 1:21PM
Any day Friday theough Monday works for me! - susanann  8.9 #10811 2:12PM
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We will be there in November - makeitbluesaysmerriwether  32.2 #5385 9:58AM
I heard there's a cool Winchester Mystery House meetup 😬 - adventurerEnDisneylandia {AED}  966.3 #175 7:17PM
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When is this race? - secretagentangel  1698.9 #88 6:15PM
The 5K is May 8th, 10K May 9th, and the Half is May 10th. - CoachDisney  79.0 #3817 2:43PM
I will for the 5k, will be there Thursday afternoon till Friday noon. - Sleepingbeautysmom  305.0 #824 8:17AM

DISNEYLAND PARK:

Innoventions closed March 31-September 30


DISNEY CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE:

Luigi's Flying Tires closed through Dec 1
 

Were visiting during the diamond celebration.  I'm so excited because all of our favorite rides will be open! - Dsc1983  16.2 #7585 10:53PM
Awesome! Can't wait! - PrincessDaisy  307.7 #813 8:33AM
No!! Peter Pan is one of my favorites... I was hoping to ride it next weekπŸ˜₯😒 - girl97217  116.0 #3215 7:20PM
It really surprises me that they didn't have Peter Pan finished by the time the Diamond Celebration started. I'm going next week and will be sad to miss it.  - RetroMinnie  54.8 #4368 10:06PM
They definitely tried!! - NeddaSzy  41.5 #4864 6:57PM
I think it was delayed, originally supposed to be open earlier. - Sarafina  490.3 #401 12:13PM

DISCOUNTED DISNEYLAND TICKETS THROUGH MOUSEWAIT! You get 2% off select tickets if you purchase on this page and use the code MOUSEWAIT at checkout. A percentage of your total purchase comes back to MouseWait, which helps cover our monthly maintenance and development expenses! You will also get 100 Credits if you email us your receipt along with your username! 

Can you get a discount on annual passes too? - DeeDeeMouse  246.1 #1330 9:59PM
It says discount not available ... Maybe I'm doing it wrong? - gedi0614  21.8 #6535 12:13AM

Download VOYAGEERS to your device today! Discover the VOYAGEERS Society, and the magical Main Street Realm in this action packed adventure for kids of ALL ages! Also available on iBooks and Kobo. Follow the VOYAGEERS on Facebook for more info and behind the scenes exclusives.

Like normal I am late to the party. Reading it now - Tealtownfan  1015.5 #168 3:13PM
Got it! More than halfway thru it! It's a lot of fun!!!πŸ‘πŸ‘βœ¨βœ¨ - TinkerSchelle  1683.2 #91 10:53PM
There are 100's of people standing at bag check. Lines backed up to La Brea Bakery. They've stopped people here to herd over people already in DCA over to DL. And, we see 100's of those folks standing at the gates.  - thompsonsyl  5.2 #16929 2:36AM
  - mckelfam  36.3 #5118 3:09PM


Hey I'm finally on this list πŸ˜„πŸ‘πŸŽ‰ - Sweet_Irish_Cream  4398.6 #25 10:39PM
Your always on the list!!! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚list of what I don't know😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝. Jk - Fantasmicfan1  1296.2 #118 12:34PM
I made the list last night! So cool, huh?! Congrats on the MW acknowledgement!!!  - MommyandBash  107.0 #3380 10:42PM
Love seeing everyone's pictures from Disneyland !! I know, we always have a good time :) - Lyssa2012  196.1 #1967 11:22PM
i am so glad i got to experience it,  but did not have to go thru it! - MsTikiMermadam  335.0 #674 5:56AM
Sweet, I have 3 on this list!!  - MisFit.Mouse  618.2 #304 2:52AM
After all of this time being away and I made the list - cyndaws  257.9 #1208 1:45AM

Here are the Weekly Top 10 TRIVILATOR Players. Find people to play here. Play Disneyland Trivia with your friends on iOS. Play on any device with our new web version here.

1. DisneyMakesMeSmile
10.65

2. Goofytom
5.36

3. mamabeam
1.76

4. DisneylandOrBust
0.66

5. MHN15
0.51

6. Dolewhipped
0.42

7. MommyandBash
0.3

8. calibecca81
0.17

9. Tom
0.15

10. richiii3
0.14

 

Yay @@Moog!!!! So great!  πŸ˜ - valj84DisneyAddict  170.9 #2312 6:28PM
You sweet thing!  You crack me up!  I'm merely an apprentice being schooled by @@Tom!! - Moog  43.4 #4773 11:33AM
πŸ‘‹β€οΈ - Tom  8988.6 #5 11:47AM
Wtg @DisneyMakesMeSmile and @@Moog ;) - otilegna  2171.4 #64 7:41PM
A major compliment from someone who hands me my you know what every game, @@otilegna 😜!!! - Moog  43.4 #4773 8:05PM
Yay !!!  - otilegna  2171.4 #64 9:42AM
Yay I'm on the list!! First top 10 list I've ever made :) - TiggerBelle  473.9 #418 10:40AM
Probably just jinxed myself lol - TiggerBelle  473.9 #418 10:41AM
First thing I've ever been on too! ☺️ add me for a game so we can keep it up πŸ˜‰ haha - ames013  100.9 #3473 10:37AM

What if Walt never dreamed of Disneyland? What would your life be like? What would the world be like? Get Book Two of the VOYAGEERS Saga - The Great Storyteller - on Amazon. Buy the Paperback and get the Kindle version FREE! 

Thank you Admin! This book is a great read. I recommend it to anyone who is a Disney fan. Can't wait for the next one! - grumpypapa  3201.4 #38 8:38PM
Thank you for reading! - Admin  6:26PM
cant wait to read it - ebugsmama  17.8 #7232 10:32PM
Yours is much nicer than Mickeys - leopardditz2000  690.1 #259 7:34PM
After the video my 3 & 1/2 year old says, "that's cool!" It was. Very cool - MommyandBash  107.0 #3380 3:44PM

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