2441.6 #52 (DL Qual #30

Sep 1, 2013 10:05 PM  Disneyland Talk Land
I've really been missing Disneyland lately, and one attraction I really like is the Jungle Cruise (poster courtesy of Google). I miss the one-liners and jokes... Do you have a favorite you can share?

Last night the skipper said "there's a boa in a tree. H-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love.......then asphyxiation." I laughed at that one and he said to me "oh, you know what marriage is like."  I laughed more and he said "getting a little too real, huh?" - duckymomo  44.5 #4809 8:25AM
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ - LilMissPixie84  309.5 #814 9:23AM
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ - MeridaFan  3623.3 #37 9:33AM
LOL - Cinderella_Schnooks  3235.7 #40 9:35AM
Omg lol πŸ˜‚πŸ‘ - princessb5  186.8 #2113 9:36AM
Lol that's funny! I haven't heard that one!  - Seebritatdland  268.6 #1129 9:42AM
I love that line! - ythdudette  1297.6 #125 6:57PM
There are too many to post (since I hear them every time I work in Adventureland...). Here's a few: CM gets on queue speaker: "May I have your attention please! Whoever lost a bundle of cash wrapped in a rubber band, please see the nearest skipper. We have found your rubber band...". Another: "Please do not take pictures while in line. I repeat, please do not take pictures while in line. The pictures are bolted to the wall. Thank you." - BaseballMickey_CM  7254.4 #9 10:09PM
I've heard the rubber band one before, (love it), but the pictures in line is a new one for me! Love it! - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 10:14PM
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I haven't heard either of those. Funny! - MeridaFan  3623.3 #37 10:36PM
We've now turned down the Nile River, the longest river in the world! If you don't believe it then you must be in denial.  - zonfire  32.9 #5446 9:03AM
O2H is by far my most favorite joke! My husband and I always cheer whenever the skipper says it, and we attempt to lead the rest of the boat in an O2H chant.Β  - Atora  2702.0 #44 10:10PM
It's the little ones you have to watch out for. They will latch on for 18-25 years.  - Geekery  409.4 #517 10:25PM
What part is that on? - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 10:33PM
Usually when passing the Indiana Jones queue  - Atora  2702.0 #44 10:36PM
The "animals" near Indy. - CM_Shadowgamer  2499.9 #50 10:40PM
LOL!!! Haven't heard that one before - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 11:16PM
"And bleed you dry!" - IDVandalSkipperCM  2412.0 #54 2:46AM
My favorite was years ago when I was in the queue about to board.  One of the boats was pulling away and the skipper was saying into his mike that on their journey the passengers would be seeing things "even more terrifying than that girl in the pink shirt."  I was the girl in the pink shirt.  πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ - Bo22  392.2 #546 10:47PM
In the queue "looking for a tall, fit, blonde hair blue eyed female between 18-23. If you find one send her to me." - GoofyMom77  728.8 #253 11:28PM
At the end, "Get out! Oh, I'm sorry that was rude.... PLEASE get out" πŸ˜‚ Or "lower your head and watch your step. And if you don't lower your head watch your language" lol They know me too well πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ - SPandEvLover  3976.5 #32 9:34AM
Love this one!   - MeridaFan  3623.3 #37 9:41AM
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ - HandMeAChurroImmaFaint  5720.3 #18 9:50AM
"You don't see that every day. Well...I do." - Alicewhoareyou  2221.5 #64 10:09PM
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ love that one! - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 10:16PM
I miss the jungle cruise too but my all time favourite is pirates! - piratepat  19.8 #6988 10:40PM
"If anyone has not seen the Jungle Book...there it is." (Only visitors to Magic Kingdom will get this one.) - CM_Shadowgamer  2499.9 #50 10:45PM
"Most people take it for granite." - LittleAprilShowers  562.8 #343 10:49PM
This is one of my favorites too! - duckchub  557.8 #348 10:57PM
"Come on, that joke rocks!" - CM_Shadowgamer  2499.9 #50 11:08PM
πŸ‘†πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 11:54PM
one of my favorites was near the end after trader sam and the shrunken head thing, the skipper pointed to the wall of the Aladdin complex and said "if you need to find the restrooms just follow the directions on that wall." It's in arabic. I am still curious as to what it really sayes. - Plumiegirl  9511.9 #4 10:53PM
According to a CM I trained with, he said it doesn't say much. It's just gibberish. The one word he did find is "river". - IDVandalSkipperCM  2412.0 #54 2:47AM
The skipper says... I was over at trader SAMs for dinner and I said your wife makes a great stew and he said, I know, I am going to miss her!πŸ²πŸ‘€πŸ™€πŸ˜ΉπŸ˜ΉπŸ˜Ή - Boundin  618.7 #310 10:57PM
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ‘ - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 11:17PM
Have you met my girlfriend a-net? She's a real catch.  - sewedna  550.7 #352 11:03PM
And sometimes they say what a bad joke that was, because he doesn't have a girlfriend. - APirateslifeforme31  170.1 #2354 7:36AM
I heard a new two new ones the other night.  At least they were new to me.  One was, I stead of "back side of water" it was the "back stage area of world of color" and then at the end, instead of "pair of docks" it was "let's end this trip on a high note:****commence with high pitch tarzan type yell***"  - Zippitydoodani  260.3 #1212 11:04PM
Great lines!!! - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 11:17PM
The first time I took my kids the skipper says, 'My name is Jesus (hay soos), not Jesus πŸ™ - HalfCaff  463.9 #444 11:11PM
"Keep an eye on your children, they can be used as a floatation device." Something like that. Lol - pinkmonkeys  528.6 #376 11:18PM
My fave is still "let me point out some of the local plant life...*points to random area* there's some right there...*points to other random area* and some more over there" πŸ˜‚ so lame but I laugh every time!!!! - GitsieMouse  265.6 #1156 11:31PM
I laugh at that one all the time too! One of my faves! - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 11:52PM
O2H, O2H - SDKimble  156.9 #2560 11:39PM
Whiny they turn to the plants saying they all have names and then introduce them as Larry, Bob, Terry, etc. LOL - Cinderella_Schnooks  3235.7 #40 4:26AM
"They're only dangerous when they blow bubbles and wiggle their ears" - TheNewTrent  749.0 #239 4:28AM
"There's a lot of rocks on the beach, there must be millions!" Or I love, "Here's the second most feared animal in the jungle The great elephant! Now if you look to your right you'll see the second, his mother in law." Cracks me up every time!  - MaleficentMom  217.9 #1718 4:44AM
Not really a one-liner - but I love the birthday song they sing β™«β™ͺβ™«"This is your birthday song, it isn't very long." β™ͺβ™«β™«   - CallMeFlower  423.7 #485 7:06AM
"I'm only am elected official...I can make decisions on my own" πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ - 2BeignetOrNot2Beignet  1282.6 #127 8:08AM
Hahah - HandMeAChurroImmaFaint  5720.3 #18 9:13AM
This isn't a line but once years ago the skipper said "ladies and gentlemen we have a celebrity on board. Everyone please give a round a applause for Sandra Bullock!" He was referring to me. I am often told I look like her and this was mortifying as an 18 year old but now I think it's hilarious.  - tballzz  558.2 #346 10:50AM
I bet you look like my sister! She looks a lot like SB too! - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 4:46PM
When the skipper picks up the gun and *SAYS*, "Bang! Bang! Ricochet!! Ricochet!!"  We are giggling about it right now - HandMeAChurroImmaFaint  5720.3 #18 4:21PM
I like: " oh and here we have Ginger. She is a big croc..... But be careful, ginger snaps!!" - HiddenMickeyFanatic  1194.1 #139 6:40PM
not a joke but I thought there was a movie based in jungle cruise in development, slated for next year or 2015 release starring tim allen.  now where did I see that?????  will have to find it for you. - secretagentangel  2355.9 #59 6:51PM
Skipper states at the beginning of the tour "Who woke up this morning and said, I HAVE to go on the Jungle Cruise today?  I DO, every morning". Then something about "every 7 minutes" - MermaidHunter  129.6 #2987 6:53PM
I was about 10 so this was ages ago. Heading toward the dock the Skipper told a joke: What did Snow White say when she was at the Fotomat? Someday my prints will come!!  - ythdudette  463.5 #298 6:59PM Flag  Edit  Delete Like  Reply - ythdudette  1297.6 #125 7:01PM
"Now here's one for those of you that can read minds:............." - garrlusdland  67.6 #4109 7:11PM
.........(mentally laughing)... πŸ˜‚ - DisneyDavidEMT  2441.6 #52 8:39PM

Disneyland unFORECAST (BETA) is here! Top MouseWaiters giving you the rundown of what's happening at the Disneyland Resort. The unFORECAST now has its own page on the web www.unFORECAST.com

unFORECAST for the week of September 29, 2015
Mickey's Halloween Party has an interesting effect on crowd levels. This week, Disneyland will close early on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday to host the party. Disneyland Park crowds are usually lighter on party days (with the exception of Friday). Last weekend was very busy, while this Monday was not. Looking back at MouseWait's Historical Crowd Index (available in our MagicPlan iOS Calendar), this week last year averaged in the low 60s (approx 60% capacity). Important note when comparing last year's Crowd Index: we've seen larger crowds on average this year due to the 60th Celebration activities. To get a real-time look at crowd levels, check the MouseWait App for Crowd Index averages and wait times. Have a great week! - Admin Sep 29, 2015 11:33AM

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Saturday's rule! One of the perks of a premium pass!  - snappy  408.7 #520 7:32AM
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Any day Friday theough Monday works for me! - susanann  8.9 #11108 2:12PM
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Innoventions reopens as Star Wars Launch Bay November 16
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Were visiting during the diamond celebration.  I'm so excited because all of our favorite rides will be open! - Dsc1983  16.2 #7761 10:53PM
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Hey! Space Moutain will be down November 10th as per the Disneyland website. Any ideas why or when it will open? Were scheduled to be down there on the 12th! TIA✨ - Tinkertoes83  26.5 #6012 8:04PM
They are redoing the ride with a Star Wars theme  - hatboxmermaid  0.0 #0 9:47PM
Should be back online nov 16 - quote  125.9 #0 11:55AM
Does anyone know how long it will be down for? My kids and I are going for the first time Nov 13-1710th? - walker05  0.2 #95083 4:43PM

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Play Disneyland Trivia with your friends for FREE! See the list of TRIVILATOR usernames on this page. Play from any device with our new web version

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 Everyone for making   - Boundin  618.7 #310 10:21PM
That's awesome but like me a lot of ppl can't enter wait times I can't ever open or connect while in the park  - mickeyat78  1874.6 #81 5:39AM
Wow. Sorry to hear that. I'm on ATT and sometimes can't connect, tho it is rare - Melody_CM  7607.5 #8 8:12PM
Does ATT have personal space for power . I know that's not the correct name. Look in settings.  - suzieq65  95.6 #3580 2:46PM
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Can you get a discount on annual passes too? - DeeDeeMouse  274.9 #1070 9:59PM
How do you get discount on AP passes. Guessing use MOUSEWAIT - suzieq65  95.6 #3580 4:00PM
You get discounts on AP by renewing early. It's through Disney . They'll send you a card.  - secretagentangel  2355.9 #59 8:58PM
It says discount not available ... Maybe I'm doing it wrong? - gedi0614  34.2 #5355 12:13AM
Apparently whatever I was trying to buy doesn't apply. Dang - Poisen_Ivy  283.6 #982 12:47PM

Here are the Weekly Top 10 TRIVILATOR Players. Find people to play here. Play Disneyland Trivia with your friends on iOS. Play on any device with our new web version here.

1. DisneyMakesMeSmile

2. Quiweez

3. DisneylandOrBust

4. Goofytom

5. beentoall

6. mamabeam

7. Dolewhipped

8. Boundin

9. sawman911

10. DonaldRox


Yay @@Moog!!!! So great!  πŸ˜ - valj84DisneyDeppAddict  237.9 #1452 6:28PM
You sweet thing!  You crack me up!  I'm merely an apprentice being schooled by @@Tom!! - Moog  89.7 #3670 11:33AM
πŸ‘‹β€οΈ - Tom  9348.0 #5 11:47AM
Wtg @@DisneyMakesMeSmile and @@Moog ;) - otilegna  2372.8 #58 7:41PM
A major compliment from someone who hands me my you know what every game, @@otilegna 😜!!! - Moog  89.7 #3670 8:05PM
Yay !!!  - otilegna  2372.8 #58 9:42AM
hey that's my bro! Great job, @@sawman911 - Lisapedia  15.9 #0 6:16PM
You should get the app and give it a shot! - sawman911  956.2 #182 7:32PM
@@sawman911 Trivilator isnt letting me continue our game 😭 it keeps saying waitin for others to complete challenge but I know it's my turn. I don't know what happened! I think we need to restart!  - LindseyanaJones  215.9 #1740 9:20AM
I'm getting the same message, but I went already. I'll start a new game now. Goodluck! - sawman911  956.2 #182 11:43AM

Easily manage the social side of MouseWait for Disneyland and Disney World with our new mousetopia app for iOS. Post to the DL or WDW side, use your Stickers, and utilize our new MouseWait Messenger. Optimized for iOS 8 and the iPhone 6! See what's new here

Follow the new MouseWait Blog for updates, how-tos, tips, contests, and more! 

Didn't know there was one. Yay - TrueFromOzLovesDisney  483.8 #414 4:20PM
Iam new to this love reading the post and looking at the pictures   - Disneydollarpam  2.4 #57496 9:01AM


1. Winnie111286

2. grumpypapa

3. Coaster

4. OhanaPhoto

5. luvmygreenarmyman

6. NikkiSea

7. luxkitty

8. shwiga

9. Taunton

10. FNNerds


Wow I've never made a list before. Thanks - disneybob49  340.4 #666 9:59AM
I love Disneyland! - Melody_CM  7607.5 #8 11:30PM
The link never works for me to see the list. It always just take me back to the top of the lounge. Any ideas? - Quiweez  91.1 #3640 9:52AM
Woohoo!  I made a MW list!!!   - luvmygreenarmyman  474.7 #427 10:36PM

Subscribe to the MouseWait Email NEWSletter for Disneyland and MouseWait news, and never miss an update! 

Nice pic!πŸ“· - Stitchcrazy62622  17.5 #7445 10:18PM
Oh how we miss you MSEP... 😩😩😩 - DisneyBallers  28.9 #5800 10:05PM
what is MSEP? - markchop  37.3 #5159 9:35PM
Main Street Electrical Parade - sawman911  956.2 #182 9:33AM
Awesome!! - stanvoodoo  24.6 #6245 7:25PM

Our new Walt Disney World App for iOS is here! MagicSearch, upNEXT, new Lounge, and tons of other upgrades. Go get it here. You can see all of the new features and how tos here

thanks admin - Fantasmicfan1  1396.7 #111 9:42PM
  - jacdanfan  9582.5 #3 6:08AM
- Lilogirl1  123.3 #3096 4:26PM
Thanks! DW fans appreciate you! - LeighMouse  17.9 #0 7:58AM

Here are the Top 10 MouseWaiters of All-Time:

1. Coaster

2. Dave

3. jacdanfan

4. Plumiegirl

5. Tom

6. goofygal

7. uscdisneyteacher

8. Melody_CM

9. BaseballMickey_CM

10. CobbPR

Such great people on this list, many who doSo much for the app. 😍😍 - secretagentangel  2355.9 #59 2:09PM
Yay! Thank you! - Song  1868.2 #82 8:50AM

Download VOYAGEERS to your device today! Discover the VOYAGEERS Society, and the magical Main Street Realm in this action packed adventure for kids of ALL ages! Also available on iBooks and Kobo. Follow the VOYAGEERS on Facebook for more info and behind the scenes exclusives.

Like normal I am late to the party. Reading it now - Tealtownfan  1015.6 #173 3:13PM
Got it! More than halfway thru it! It's a lot of fun!!!πŸ‘πŸ‘βœ¨βœ¨ - TinkerSchelle  1801.0 #86 10:53PM
  - mckelfam  39.5 #5039 3:09PM
Weeeeee - MommyandBash  264.2 #1177 10:29PM

TRIVILATOR 2.0 for iOS is here! We made it faster, easier to use, improved Random Games, fixed Push Notifications, added a Remove Ads option, new game packs, and we optmized it for the iPhone 6 and 6 Plus. Get the complete run down on our new blog here. Get the new update in the App Store, or grab it here. Did you know you can play on the web or from any device via our web version? Tell your friends about the TRIVILATOR, and submit your questions so they (and you) can be featured inside the app. You can submit your questions here. Have fun!

- valj84DisneyDeppAddict  237.9 #1452 12:58PM
Hi, @@valj84DisneyAddict Hope you are having a wonderful Easter 🐣Come play Trivilator with me! - Moog  89.7 #3670 3:00PM
Yes! A wonderful day!  Hope yours is great too!!! I will look for you on Trivilator. πŸ˜πŸ‘ - valj84DisneyDeppAddict  237.9 #1452 3:27PM
Is it a game? - palomine96  20.6 #6849 11:58PM
Yes!  It's a separate app.  Come play! - Moog  89.7 #3670 8:58AM
- djmickeymouse  8.6 #0 5:17PM
- princessvg  42.6 #4889 8:35AM

What if Walt never dreamed of Disneyland? What would your life be like? What would the world be like? Get Book Two of the VOYAGEERS Saga - The Great Storyteller - on Amazon. Buy the Paperback and get the Kindle version FREE! 

Thank you Admin! This book is a great read. I recommend it to anyone who is a Disney fan. Can't wait for the next one! - grumpypapa  3921.5 #33 8:38PM
Thank you for reading! - Admin  6:26PM
cant wait to read it - ebugsmama  18.1 #7324 10:32PM
- DarthFairy  246.7 #1350 4:40PM
My life would be BORING!!! - PracticallyPerfectDisneyDuck  36.0 #0 10:31AM

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TOP MWs of the WEEK

1.Winnie111286 339.43 #17  
2.Coaster 278.9 #1  
3.grumpypapa 216.28 #33  
4.JPatDL 214.75 #120  
5.luvmygreenarmyman 137.13 #427  
6.sawman911 122.62 #182  
7.EastBaytoLA 118.99 #179  
8.OhanaPhoto 116.05 #30  
9.pikarich 109.5 #24  
10.DisneyDrea 78.34 #965  

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